The Tea Man, The Indomie Man or The Cow Tail Man?

Men are very unique set of beings, created to rule, un-rule and re-rule. They want to be in charge, control women, money and the world. They want to be loved and respected. We love them. We hate them. Today, I share about the three types of men that are known to exist under the sun.

The first man does not cook but can pour just at the first sight of a woman. He doesn't have to be lanky for you to know how fast he spills because even the supposed macho men spill from mere kissing, touch or even a hot grab because a blow job will be a long thing. Half the time, all he needs to spill is just the less than 3 seconds 7 alphabet count of P to V. The most annoying part of the story is that he will be the one that keeps ranting about how good he is or how much fish he had point and killed in the neighborhood. He may be really handsome like a snake, but he is as weak as a cat. You never need mind him.
We call him The Tea Man.

The second man will tell the world that he is Johnny Sins. He shares stories of how he had a threesome and the two girls fainted, or of how he was awake all night hitting the nail on the head. He tells you how bad that girl is in bed and how amazing the other one is. When he says he went 5 times just remember the only time he did, he didn't last 10 seconds before he screamed stupidly and spilled. If he had a chance he will even sign up to feature in a porn, he will always have condoms in he’s wallet like a champion, taking lots of alcohol to show his friends he is killing it tonight but when it’s time for the race, he jerks five times  or less and the game is over. You may have seen him but this man is called The
Indomie Man.

The Last man standing is really the last to stand. He doesn't even talk about the honey because he has the mantle. He is excellence in detail, knows all the rules and plays by them, he doesn't miss a part and the act is detailed. He knows when to pump and when to jerk. He bends it, lifts it, under rides it and even supervises it. He can be right there and you will go to Balogun Market from Lekki. He was there when Minister for Waka Waka travelled from Lagos to Abuja on foot and back. He stays on the matter waiting for a plea, a faint or for the V to get a K shape before he spills like a gladiator with than manly smell, rainy sweat, and breathing sounds that the neighbors love to hear. This is the man every woman needs to meet.
Say hello to The Cow Tail Man, ladies.
Ahem, now, dear men, which one of the above best describes you? Yes; you!